Quotes, Creeds, And Other Funny Sayings

[Hussars 511]

Okay, so it's been a few weeks/months since we had a thread for quotes so...

 

Let's try a new one... any funny words to share on specific, non-political and/or non-religion topics, professional groups of people, etc... just keep it clean and keep in mind that while taking a "shot across the bow" at politics itself is okay, don't start debates please.

 

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Engineering/Engineers:

 

 "It ultimately falls to every engineer to design a simpler system faster than the universe can design a better idiot, so far, the universe is winning" - Engineers Creed [unofficial]

 

 "The concept of engineering is two fold, not to fold" - Uncredited

 

Programming/Programmers:

 

 "There are 10 types of people in the world, those who understand binary, and those who don't" - Uncredited adage

 

Politicians (Keep it friendly please)

 

Generalized:

 

 "Reader, suppose you were an idiot.  And suppose you were a member of Congress, but I repeat myself" - Mark Twain

 

 "Tact is the ability to tell someone to 'Go to Hell' in such a way that they look forward to the trip." - Winston Churchill

 

Specific:

-Al Gore (Former U.S. Vice-President) talking with Jay Leno

Jay Leno: "How do you feel being treated like a movie star?" 

Gore: "Well, it's not all all easy. For example, I'm in this huge feud with Lindsay Lohan now."
Leno: "Really? Can you give us a little more?"
Gore: "No, she knows what she did."

 

- Dan Quayle

Too many to select just one...

http://politicalhumor.about.com/cs/quotethis/a/quaylequotes.htm

[Radni 1,089]

Your Mother is a Hamster and your Father smells of Elderberries!

[RyanEdward 1]

I hate when old people poke you at a wedding and say "you're next". So next time I was at a funeral I poked them and said "you're next".

Source: quotes on life

[Karrde 339]

Not an exact quote; however, its pretty close to something Twain said.

 

 /me points at sig