On my way out (and a final feedback... not to the devs, but to you :P)

[Bloodreina 300]

Hey everyone!

 

I have this message in draft since a good while, but I kept postponing it because I wanted to make sure that I won't change my mind or regret it.

 

Long story short, I decided to quit the game and since I'm a bit of a drama queen I couldn't do it without letting you know and trying to get my last moment in the spotlight (kidding... kinda :P). Now seriously I'm not posting this (only ) for that last moment in the spotlight, but because I consider that in a world where too many quit silently, having someone leave a feedback about why they did it might help others reconsider their actions, especially since the reason I'm quitting is not game mechanics related, but people/community related.

 

I'm a Steam kid, joining the game when the Northern Freedom Isles were launched, and I have to say that for the first couple of months I had tremendous amounts of fun - there was a living world around me and a lot of people to get involved with and work on shared projects (like building a love tile, finding our first horses, hunt for those reluctant furs for our beds or kill that champ troll that kept pestering one of the neighbors). The freedom chat was really lively, I had tens of people on my friends list (both in game and on Discord) with whom I was talking on a daily basis and I even founded a rather large local alliance that grew even behind my expectations, having at the point when I left it (just because I moved out to another area of the map) over 40 villages and 80 people in it all of them in the same general map area.

 

Then things started to go south. And I don't talk here about the people that quit or moved out when Cadence launched a bit later (because both events were more or less expected to happen). I talk about the people that still play, but which pretty much started to mind only their own business and stopped almost entirely being social (at least towards me). The freedom chat is radio silent for the most part of the day. With one or two exceptions people in my friends list never message me unless I message them first (I honestly can't remember when was the last time when someone in my FL checked out on me to just see how my day was). I tried to meet my neighbors - no luck whatsoever. I tried to start another alliance (not local) - not a single answer in more than a month. I tried to join an alliance - again, not a single answer in a week.

 

Ok, maybe I'm not the nicest person out there. Having an autism disorder and a fair share of hardships going through my life is not easy to be one. But I definitely tried to be nice, friendly, social and supportive with everyone around me (well, maybe except two people). And for the most part I honestly think that I managed to. Still, except people trying to recruit me to their villages and people that wanted to sell me something, I end up feeling almost completely alone. And it honestly s***s, up to the point where it end up being one of my worst (if not the worst) experiences and feelings I had in all the MMORPGs that I played before. And that's why I decided to quit the game (that I still love) and where I'm still heavily involved, with both premium and deed upkeep covered for well more than a year from now on.

 

Now, if it's indeed only me and this all happened because of my fault (a fault I'm not aware of, but whatever) then it's all good and you should just ignore this stupid rant of mine. But, if it's not and it's a general thing, that makes other people quit too, then maybe start considering if you can't do something more to support Wurm than buy your premium and coins from shop. Maybe engage with the other players you see around and make them feel welcomed in this world. It may help make other people stick longer.

 

Just my two coppers...

 

Octavia over and out...

 

[Vessel 51]

It is unfortunate that you feel this way. But try looking at this from a different perspective. Not for a game, but for yourself, because it seems like you're quick to blame yourself and feel bad as a result.

First, some people are just semi-afk watching something on a second/third monitor while grinding. Tis within the nature of this game.

Second, not many people enjoy interacting with people that much. Silent chat may be a detriment to you, but others might just have it collapsed at all times and not think twice about it, meanwhile making you upset.

Honestly, coming from modern MMOs sometimes I feel like Wurmians are a bit too talkative, but to each his own. 

What I can recommend to you is either look for a social game of some kind or look for people to talk to in other places.

Good luck.

[Loll557 10]

I'm sorry to hear that everyone isn't playing to your playstyle.

You could always talk in GL which is always active rather than the freedom chat or why don't you try another server or a fresh toon on SFI to see if that's more your liking before giving up completely. Melody is the smallest island in the cluster and least populated from what I can tell. 

 

You make the game what it is - you can't expect us to make it for you. If you truly love it like you said then you'll find a way. 

 

Otherwise toodles 👋

 

 

[Votip 1353]

2 hours ago, Bloodreina said:

With one or two exceptions people in my friends list never message me unless I message them first (I honestly can't remember when was the last time when someone in my FL checked out on me to just see how my day was).

thats how life works, not only wurm

[Badvoc 203]

Quitting again how many times is that now? 

 

Joking aside, I do understand where you are coming from to a point, Wurm is a funny old game where the early levels are exciting more so on a fresh server.

 

The hunt for a little land, the trials and troubles of gaining the first few important items, the busy local as everyone tries to make a mark and then the same thing that happens with every new server launch people get bored.

 

You have the Vets, long time wurm players who love the new land, fresh ready to make a stamp, but after a point a lot of them just don't have the heart to do end game grinding yet again and go back to old characters who are many many years old, I think of these people as the holiday crowd ( not a bad thing ) people who just need a break from their main and enjoyed the freshness of the new server, but like all holidays they come to an end and go home.

 

then you have the newbies who at the start find the game hard to grasp at times, but as you pointed out have loads to do,  then.... they get the "what do I do now?" I have had messages loads of times from people asking me what they should do next, these players likely are used to theme park games and its hard to adjust at times to the sandbox nature of wurm, you have to make your own content, what to do after building your castle or after reaching your set goal? 

 

You also have the "got to get it done crowd" players who play crazy hours , do crazy feats and just quite simply burn out. Some fantastic items and places made by these guys, burn bright but not for long.

 

Then there's the types who I think stick around-   the spreadsheet crowd people who love the numbers of wurm, the math the ins and outs of grinding them numbers, every point towards 100 another notch on the belt and then the laidback who find wurm just relaxing, pop on for a couple of hours here and there or when need to hammer the game to get something done, these players sometimes quit for months at a time and then pop back like putting on the favourite pair of slippers. 

 

The above is how I see it and is my impressions of the game, is by no means right just my personal views.

 

With regards chat, everyday I log on even with the quiet times, I get messages from people I have met in game asking how things are, we catch up and then tend to do our own thing ( I listen to books / watch documentaries   ) while doing some tasks , surface mining comes to mind. I also know a few of my friends chat via voice, its just too hard to text chat when grinding, don't want to waste the sleep powder now. 

 

You made fun of me the other night, due to me "jumping between projects" but that's how I have fun in wurm, I work on something for a bit and if it starts to feel like work or gets stressful I put that on the back burner and do something else, I have a list of goals I want to do and if it takes 1,2 or even 10 years to complete it doesn't matter, as wurm is my escape from real life and the stress I have there. After a tough day in real life logging on and doing a little "mindless" mining or digging is just the ticket, I don't have to over think things or worry about my DPS or HPS ( looking at you wow ) I can just relax, go afk when needed, grab a coffee and mine another corner down.

 

I think the point I am trying to make badly there is no right or wrong way to play wurm.

 

One thing I will say, you will be back, wurm is under your skin

 

[TheTrickster 1840]

@Bloodreina , this isn't intended as recruiting, but have you considered trying on the southern servers?  I play both, well actually, I play in the south and have a toon in the north.  I rarely find any desire to play in the north.  My experience of the "community" there is one of players being rather self-absorbed (sorry if that offends anyone, but that is my experience).  Wells and fountains fenced off, people who simply ignore hails, others who tell you off for talking within their local.  Complaints of unavailable animals while nobody will take giveaway animals.  Prices were breathtaking.  I tried all 3 northern pve servers.

 

I can't help but contrast that with my experience on Release.  I am in a village where there is a mix of people who work together and people who work alone, there is usually chatter going on in the alliance chat, requests for help are always answered, jokes shared, advice given.  

[Bierking 1]

...forget about it

Edited January 18, 2021 by Bierking

[Spolmit 516]

@Bloodreina, there are few people who can say that they 'get on' with everyone. Judging by all the positive comments that you have received during your too-short time here in Wurm, there are many people who value your input and feel that you are an asset to Wurm.

 

We all make mistakes and if you can accept that, then I feel sure that there is a great future for you here in Wurm. 

 

The fact that you did not receive any invites to a village or alliance does not mean that people do not want you, rather they value their independence and hermit-like existence. 

 

You say that you still love the game. That in itself tells me that in your heart of hearts you really do want to stay in our ever-expanding Wurm world. I hope that you will think again about your decision and give it another go- perhaps trying another server or even Wurm Unlimited.

 

You never know, you may just find a fantastic new start out of this thread?

 

Good luck with your final decision and hope to see you playing for a long time yet!

[TheMacGregor 9]

Because of the long action timers people tend to pay only a little attention to the game after they have been at it for awhile. Once they get up to four or five actions stacked it's even easier to do something other than watch the timer fill. 😆

[Jaz 2550]

I'm currently sweating out 600 support beams. You can imagine I do nothing but just press the create or continue button for hours, hardly even looking at the screen (just an advice: make sure you do an active  eysweep every 2-3 minutes on the game screen looking for a strange popup window, being unresponding while doing actions for longer periods may trigger a ban ...)

[Chisco 52]

Shame to see you leave, especially if you enjoy the game in the first place.

You can always try to hop on SFI and hit up one of the solid communities there - there is a few that is very active and value community and activity together

 

I myself play in the middle of nowhere on xanadu, ive seen 1 person in local the last year. I myself know what lonely is But I did join an active alliance even though they are far away, the chat is going strong. And i've met a couple people that I enjoy talking to.

Hope you come back and give it another shot one day

[Zarwaddim 37]

Curios as to why you don't make mention of server events? On Harmony, for example, someone has hosted three boat races and one horse race (same person, just about once a week or so for the last month plus). Also on Harmony, there were two Rifts in the past few weeks and another one that already took place today, or is currently happening. I mention these types of things because sometimes you have to seek out socializing. The alternative, and something you didn't mention as well, was creating your own event and having people come to you for some socializing.

Edited January 18, 2021 by Zarwaddim

[Hod 12]

Ohh those boat and horse races - I simply love them and big thanks to @CistaCistafor doing them. As a long term Wurm player the best times are the community (and the sadly discontinued GM driven) events.

[goemo 10]

Aww  goodbye i hope to see you again one day o/

[Kellen 76]

Have you considered joining an active village and not requiring them to pay you? I know you've made previous posts saying you'll join someone's village as long as they pay you 30 silver a month while really only being able to provide Enchanted Grass and playing up to an hour or so a day.

 

Hate to see someone quit the game because people aren't talking yet they won't join one of the most social aspects of the game (villages) unless they're paid to do so.

[Ekcin 2062]

I liked your writings. Where ever you go, have a good time. Maybe consider Wurm when having been out for a while. All the best.

[CistaCista 252]

On 1/20/2021 at 3:06 AM, Kellen said:

pay you 30 silver a month .

 

lol what.

[Kellen 76]

4 hours ago, CistaCista said:

lol what.

 

 

[Wilczan 2002]

18 minutes ago, Kellen said:

 

 

Wow.

 

First time I see person that wants to be payed for joining someone's village.

 

Normally, if you join village, you are rather expected to give something (like helping or adding to upkeep) not be payed.

Sometimes you do not have any expectations from villagers (I have never asked any of my villagers to give anything).

[Bloodreina 300]

@Wilczan

@CistaCista

@Kellen

Yes, I did not entertain the idea of joining a village and doing free work for someone's else projects, with the risk that (s)he can always kick me out of village or anything. Wurm resembles enough a second job with its repetitive tasks, that I think it can at least be a second job you do pursuing your own dreams and projects, not someone's else ones.

 

And if you actually bother to read it, my ad was more like looking for a job, not looking to join a village (since I already had a deed of my own) type of ad. I didn't requested anything that a typical villager may request, like a plot of land for building my own house, food, mats, tools or whatever - I even specifically mentioned in my post that I don't need or want any of them. Also I didn't asked to do a specific job that I would entertain, but I was willing to take on any odd tasks that the person might have needed (digging, surface mining, bricks, mortar or concrete making, whatever). So pretty much my add just said "Willing to do any odd tasks you might require for 33c per hour" and I can't honestly see anything wrong with this. Haven't really seen many people offering to work for free and not requiring some form of compensation.

 

Anyway, the idea is that I never complained about not finding a village to join. That was more of a long shot, and other than that I was very happy working on my own deed and financing my game expenses with RL$ (proof being the fact that I had already paid both premium time and upkeep for more than a year ahead).

 

All I wanted was normal human interaction, having people to chat with, not feel like I was playing a single player game in a multiplayer world. Nothing more, nothing less. And, honestly, that's the very first MMORPG where I failed to find this, while in most other ones people were actually happy to have someone to chat with. And that was particularly sad, because otherwise, game mechanics wise, I totally loved WURM.

 

Edited January 21, 2021 by Bloodreina

[necroe 668]

Have you given any thought to trying pvp servers?

You do not have to pvp on them most groups are happy to just have people around actively, usually great communities (seriously very few that were or are not)

Most have many active players and do group stuff together whether it be building towers, building deeds, digging, pvp list goes on.

PVP is often mis judged in the fact that you cannot go there and play as a "freedomer" that is almost always certainly an option.

The way things generally function is as if you are a large family/community and people will play other games together in the group often as well.

Maybe consider trying it, if not well now you see why some of us DO NOT play much on any of the freedom servers

[necroe 668]

FYI I don't play on northern because grinding yet another toon fully is not something I want to dedicate myself to at this time. But if you were to pm me I could certainly answer any questions about pvp servers in general and/or direct you to a group that might fit your play style good. Know people from pretty much every one of them.

 

[Kellen 76]

4 hours ago, Bloodreina said:

@Wilczan

@CistaCista

@Kellen

Yes, I did not entertain the idea of joining a village and doing free work for someone's else projects, with the risk that (s)he can always kick me out of village or anything. Wurm resembles enough a second job with its repetitive tasks, that I think it can at least be a second job you do pursuing your own dreams and projects, not someone's else ones.

 

And if you actually bother to read it, my ad was more like looking for a job, not looking to join a village (since I already had a deed of my own) type of ad. I didn't requested anything that a typical villager may request, like a plot of land for building my own house, food, mats, tools or whatever - I even specifically mentioned in my post that I don't need or want any of them. Also I didn't asked to do a specific job that I would entertain, but I was willing to take on any odd tasks that the person might have needed (digging, surface mining, bricks, mortar or concrete making, whatever). So pretty much my add just said "Willing to do any odd tasks you might require for 33c per hour" and I can't honestly see anything wrong with this. Haven't really seen many people offering to work for free and not requiring some form of compensation.

 

Anyway, the idea is that I never complained about not finding a village to join. That was more of a long shot, and other than that I was very happy working on my own deed and financing my game expenses with RL$ (proof being the fact that I had already paid both premium time and upkeep for more than a year ahead).

 

All I wanted was normal human interaction, having people to chat with, not feel like I was playing a single player game in a multiplayer world. Nothing more, nothing less. And, honestly, that's the very first MMORPG where I failed to find this, while in most other ones people were actually happy to have someone to chat with. And that was particularly sad, because otherwise, game mechanics wise, I totally loved WURM.

 

 

The point is that you can consider a village as a social group where people generally chat frequently throughout the day, more so than the freedom or alliance chats. If you are wanting more social interaction then it would make more sense to join a village to be apart of that social group than it is to play the single player game that you have been documenting.

 

Sure, you won't get along with everyone and may need to bounce from village to village until you find the right group but that's how the world works.

[Aeris 3669]

I feel like this might be an Expectation Vs. Reality problem regarding what you imagine an ideal ingame relationship to be like. Some people regularly message everyone on their friendslist while others only message people when they have something they want to ask: Because people are different and treat their ingame relationships according to their own expectations. Perhaps someone in your friendslist would, over time, come to message you in the way you'd want them to - Either because they've gotten to know you well enough to feel comfortable doing so, or because they know you well enough to know that they should do that to meet your needs.

 

No one is wrong in the scenario you described but it is a bit unfair of you to tell people to, and I quote, "start considering if you can't do something more to support Wurm than buy your premium". Buying your premium playtime is literally the only thing you are required to do in order to support the game (apart from following rules and community guidelines). Your need for social interaction is neither the responsibility nor the center of anyone else's gameplay. You need to remember that your needs come first only to you, so not everyone else is constantly considering your needs and wants because everyone else is focused on themselves.

 

One can certainly sympathize with your wish to have more social interaction, but the truth about that is that if you wish to interact more then the ball is in your court. Not everyone has the same drive for social interaction, and some people are even hesitant of messaging others for fear of being annoying. There's a wide variety of reasons why someone might not contact you, ranging from complete disinterest to general indifference.

[Bloodreina 300]

47 minutes ago, Kellen said:

 

The point is that you can consider a village as a social group where people generally chat frequently throughout the day, more so than the freedom or alliance chats. If you are wanting more social interaction then it would make more sense to join a village to be apart of that social group than it is to play the single player game that you have been documenting.

 

Sure, you won't get along with everyone and may need to bounce from village to village until you find the right group but that's how the world works.

 

While villages can definitely represent a social group, they're not exactly based on egalitarianism - there is a mayor who pretty much can call all the shots, being the sole owner of the results of the collective work of all villagers, who in turn have pretty much no rights. Hence why I didn't entertain the idea of joining a village, just to risk loosing all my hard work in the eventuality that I get in a conflict with the mayor or he simply goes AWOL.

 

In opposition, an alliance also represent a social group, but built on the egalitarianism system - people can still interact and work towards a common goal, but everyone still retains ownership over its own property and in case of a "break up" everyone gets to keep his or her things. Hence why I think (personal opinion) that alliances are a straight upgrade to villages and that was something that I really looked forward to since day one.

 

Now if you want to blame me for not wanting to join a village (where I would have had no control and no sense of ownership), feel free to do so, but I really didn't feel like turning in someone's else brick making slave.