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Bloodscythe

Open Note to Wurmians

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I'm almost to my 8th full year of playing wurm.  I candidly enjoy it as much today as I did at the start with regard to the features and the endless possibilities of things to do and reasons for places to go.   Since joining there have been regular game updates in functionality as well as new features and eye candy that keep me interested.  I'm someone that likes to explore all aspects to the game and therefore often in many different places randomly setting upon a task or sometimes just freelance roaming about letting the game take me in a direction or activity.

 

I play the game for entertainment, some escapism, and relaxation.  It has been a good value in that regard of what it gives back to me for what I put into it.  Over the years I've had encounters that have been joyous and not so joyous.  The down experiences are often brief and limited, while joyful moments more regularly populate my hours of play.  When playing , often I'll watch netflix, or amazon prime, listen to music, or chat on discord with fellow wurmians.  To that end it has been relatively even keel and has afforded me the gifts of meeting some amazing people and building lasting friendships without ever a bump in the road.

 

Over the last 9 or so months, it has been peculiarly different.  There seems more tension in the air, players perhaps in heightened angst are chewing on each other more than normal in a community so well known for being far above the gaming average in community kindness, maturity, helpfulness.  Moreover, players often socialize in a variety of mediums/manner sharing and making connections of substance where it's not uncommon that people extend beyond the game realm and into parts of their real life and support each other through good and bad.

 

One of the beauties of wurm is that there is no one way or correct way to play it.  There is also something for a great variety of play styles and personalities whether it be crafting, exploring and salvaging, combat play against other players, becoming merchants hawking goods for profit, being engineers building networks of roads, bridges, tunnels to connect wurmians to each other across the vast landscape, hunters of meats and hides, or the ultra class of player that wants to skill to the maximum in as many categories possible or amass skill titles for bragging rights.  With that said it's hard to imagine where someone doesn't belong other than those that cheat in some manner of the game whether by fraud, mechanics exploit, account theft, or being an extremely toxic player stealing other's joy of playing.

 

It hasn't been until recently,  that i'm really finding it harder at times to hold on to that joy of playing and feeling part of and accepted in this community.  There has been some ongoing needling at the way in which I speak, the length, the word choice.  Sometimes being an independent thinker sharing thoughts that may depart from group mentality has caused ire.  Sometimes talking at all is met with complete non response leaving me to question myself as if there is something perhaps wrong in what i'm doing.  This oddly has not come in any meaningful way years prior.  At times it has me question whether I continue to play or not, not because i don't enjoy the game but that I don't enjoy how I'm made to feel being just me.

 

As I have not changed in any substantive way over the years, I'm of the thinking that this must be either an overall atmosphere change to wurm community or it is related to the company I keep, who and where I socialize.   I'm not convinced I'm so different or some aberration.  When looking over the years at the wurm community and considering those that have been removed from the game as problem players, I don't see there is any commonality there either.   

 

What I am convinced of is there are others in the game either like me or would appreciate my way of being and my style of game play.  I'm not solely a pve player nor pvp player, I sometimes dabble in selling some goods and services for the fun/immersion aspect to the game yet by no means any prolific seller in any regard.  I tend to just play,  doing a little of everything and eventually amassing skill along they way vs any intentional grinding. It keeps me from burnout.  I also tend to rather play the game as an exploration of some far away land and derp vs for skill titles or profit selling. 

 

I am betwixt.  Part of me thinks it best to leave wurm.   A greater part of me has plans to consolidate my deeds, disbanding the bulk living in one location.  Another endeavor is to make a large scale "hiking" trail around xanadu meant not for prizes or contest other than the contest within yourself.  A trail that is meant as an experience of a different kind where what happens along they way organically builds an experience or who you choose to take the journey with and the laughs and predicaments you find yourself in while travelling.   

 

If any of what you read speaks to you, I'd like to hear about it, here or in pms.  This is just an open ended thought log meant to convey what's on my mind recently and what I hope from it.  I'd like to find others to do some activities with that are more aligned in this manner.  I've not been super successful, of recent,  in venues and activities I've taken part in.

 

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Edited by Bloodscythe
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I think you read too much in to the actions of others. Most people act and react without thought, its just their instinct. This includes the way they interact with other players, it can be effected by many things, their mood, RL events, how much sleep they've had etc etc etc. Sometimes people login and say nothing to anyone for hours, the next time they're contributing in Discord and in GL chat all the time. 

 

As always with Wurm, as in life, focus on what makes you happy and don't stress the rest of it.

 

 

 

 

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Bloodscythe, I enjoyed reading your note and I too have enjoyed the lands of Wurm for a good few years. 

 

I am thinking about your recent experiences and have thought about what could have changed for you. In the early days we had many more players to interact with. This meant that if we did find someone who we simply did not get along with (for whatever reason) then it was relatively easy to find many others who we could strike up a long-lasting in-game friendship with. This would no doubt be a more positive experience and therefore something that we would remember fondly.

 

In recent years- more specifically the last year according to your note- could it be that if you were unfortunate enough to meet a fellow player who caused you anguish or you were simply opposing types of character, it would be a lot more difficult to find another player who you could 'friend', team up with of join on adventures and builds? This again would cause your more negative recent experiences and maybe cause your opinion of the current player base to change downwards?

 

Whether I am correct or simply getting it all wrong, I sincerely hope that you can stay in Wurm and enjoy the chance to simply do what you want  and perhaps you will find a player who you can strike up a perfect in-game friendship with. All the best and think positive and I am sure you will be rewarded! :)

 

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I kind of agree with Solmark, however I don't want to come off rude. I apologize in advance if this might offend, but you do have a habit of being lengthy in your responses, be it discord, forums or ingame. Most people myself included are not interested in reading walls of text, and when they do, I think for the most part people just don't know how to respond to it generally. I'm sorry if you feel like you're getting ignored also but you shouldn't worry about how other perceive you in a online game. Take it from me when has it ever stopped me? At the end of the day Wurm Online is just a game.

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I think I understand where Bloodscythe maybe coming from on this topic. Sometimes WURM seems unthusiastic, but also the last year I have noticed we lost a lot of long term players who were fairly entrenched in the game and community. I don't know if they have left due to burnout or at times seemingly lack of new content. I know the DEV team has a bunch on their plate. WURM is so unique and has so much potential, I fear what will happen if it goes away. I dread that day. There is no game like it at this point in time. Lately it does seem like the community tends to gnash their teeth more at certain threads. We are better than that, and we are all unique individuals and shouldn't be gnashed at for expressing our thoughts.

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As I was preparing to write, I had to reroute temporarily in seeing your post @Firecat.  I see what you did there, very very clever and celebratory.   You've done the thing i do with the blocking, font change, etc.  It is the most effective and complimentary thing one could do in an authentic way, or..my sense of humor is laughing with the notion it could be a light hearted good sportsmanship trolling, touche' if so.  Yes @ArthurHawkwingyou are on point and on the trail.

 

The point of my post is not a woa is me, if it is read that way then perhaps i've failed in my communication.  I also realize when posting something this personal and open that one must also be prepared for anything to come this way and be said.   It is Interesting  how people have interpreted and responded thus far.  I don't want to say more , for i don't want to impact it in any way.  It is informative and I appreciate the effort people put in to express their own thought or like bump someone's thought to signal yah that.

 

What Is meant to be highlighted here are changes I perceive,  that weren't present before over a long cross section of time and then boiling it down further of what it has translated to me.   I penned this with the notion this is not unique to me or even about me yet i'm included.  People are also going to react differently to the post because we all are somewhat different but also from their own perspective and experiences and personalities. 

 

This is what makes it rich and informative.  Do remember also that there are as many positive things in the post if not more so than things less than.  It is human nature to gravitate to the less than, or complaint and see just that or react to it in whatever ways people do react to such things.    If how I express and write is problematic in length or content, etc then it is something I will have to consider for the future, or it may be as simple as it is not you I write for then and for those that get it will percolate and find each other.  Water meets it's level each time without fail.  What also has been said here and in another post..It's just a game...or is it?!  Above all, TY for contributing, I will look forward to seeing more thoughts and perspectives.

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Thanks for your further clarification @Bloodscythe, I perhaps didn't truly understand your sentiments initially, I think you are likely to be accurate in your assessment of how things currently are. My point was that there are so many variables in life, as there are in Wurm, that can alter how people react to circumstances and to individuals that it can be difficult to see a real trend one way or another.

 

I've always thought that Wurm cycles one way with people leaving and deeds expiring, and a general negative trend, but then it always seems to come back to life with new players joining and some old players returning. We do seem to have suffered more than the usual number of old Wurm veteran's and staff passing in recent times which would certainly be in peoples psyche,  conciously or unconciously.

 

My own Wurm playstyle is probably not that common, I started out on Indy joining the PC Gamer village, then moved to Deli when that opened, then on to Exodus when that opened, and yes, then on to Cele when that opened, whilst also being part of the first BL village on Epic and spending a fair amount of time on Chaos. I've now settled back in my old Exodus village, and have recently taken on the role of keeping the Exodus Community map up to date. I think one of the reasons I move about so much is once the deed is fully established, I get bored and so move to keep me interested. 

 

For what it's worth, you are welcome to my deed on Exodus any time you like, I'll be sure to hand out free delicious pizza and will make you, or anyone else for that matter, as welcome as I can. It goes without saying that I truly hope that you stay within the Wurm community for as long as you feel able to.

 

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Thanks for the invite @solmark, I know it is sincere and we have shared mutual respect over time for each.  I appreciate your elaboration as well, for I didn't feel you were putting some onus upon me.  Instead saying,  if you look too close at a situation you can misread it and or mis-apply it.  Sometimes an apple rolling off the table is just that.

 

 I try not to put much measure on an instance or three for you can't know what is in someones's world.  They could have just gotten fired, their grandmother who raised them because they were abandoned by their mom could have just died, maybe someone has a monthly cycle that truly immobilizes them in severity, maybe sleep deprived, maybe mom didn't wash their favorite gaming shirt and it's the big planned day of pvp, perhaps the slushy machine conked out half way through filling a  jumbo cup of Tiger's blood and it was the last day of the time limited offer. 

 

Any time i'm referencing an incident or behavior, it is something longer standing, ongoing, more than a one off or three ringer, I'd otherwise not post about it for there are predictable patterns in the seemingly unexplained.  Sometimes I'm misunderstood for my wording, sometimes i'm misunderstood because it's not convenient for me to be making sense for the other(s) involved.  There is also the "gas lighting"  effect deployed to undermine credibility as in oh he's just being weird again, sensitive, wut r u talking about, huh, your paranoid!   As time passes experience is gained, where one won't then respond to each gush of wind but instead only to larger truths and patterns that emerge.

 

Regardless how people read or don't read this, respond or don't respond, the purpose is to shine some light on some things that are transpiring  and how they are impacting me and potentially impacting others or something larger endemic in the game.

I'm quite sure i'm not alone in this

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Part of being a deep caring intimate person is getting hurt easily.

You are certainly the deepest and most philosophical person I have ever met. And to many that kind of thing can be overwhelming (not to me) in a video game. And I believe that you are beautiful who you are.
My own playstyle is somewhat similar to yours, I can never stay in the same place, I love travelling, exploring, meeting people, one of the things that motivates me to get very high in a skill is to help others and have a little thing to feel proud of.

Solmark kind of took the words out of my mouth, people are unpredictable in times of pressure or from rl issues. And It's good to learn to not read too much into people's words. Especially when they're upset or caught off guard.
One of the most important things I have learned is to keep the integrity of who I am intact with people who I speak to. Because if I find my behaviour and creative self is filtered, around them, then I am doing myself wrong.
And the most important rule of all is to respect others boundaries and protect their feelings. Something I lacked when I knew you. (Hi Bloodscythe!)
The atmosphere of the game has certainly grown dire, and hostility has massively increased. Stay pure in the midst of it, and you will have a good time, you are in more control of your emotions than you ever know. You just need to find a way, and stay close to those who appreciate your big boy heart.

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8 hours ago, Firecat said:

COMIC SANS

At face value i loved this and took it as a compliment or clever humor poke as i said earlier. 

 

Now, to emphasize the ludicrous so others don't truly misread too much into my own postings, think about the following: 

Did you know sans is french for "without and in print you'll often see a font called sans...for example sans serif. which means without a serif..the extra stylized ink stroke on the end of a vertical letter.  comic sans is a type font ofc, but to read this literal is to say my post is without comic or humor.   It was just a fun entendre' to muse as well as to illustrate how something of nothing can be taken way out of context.

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As I prefer to be a bit more private in gaming, sharing any real feels isn't always easy or feel wise for me and I also knew it would open up the ability to be trolled further and have any number of things said in that nature of what i've heard along the way. 

 

Yes @Spolmit you indeed did perceive correctly and describe a potential dynamic that is closer to my truth, thank you for putting it in such a supportive way, for there are less affirming ways you could have worded the sentiment.

 

Maybe this alone  gave this post the greatest of meaning or value when referring to your post @Wiolo.  I've noticed a great change in your own writing, expression, calm, and posture.  You are far more confident now with a sense of self and self dignity that wasn't there before, you have grown as a person.  I did not expect to see a comment from you let alone one of this strength and intentional ownership.  It buoys the notion of triumph through perseverance and self work of inner growth.   Happy and grown up you sound, it gives me peace for you to see such change as it hints that time was not unkind to you and you've not wallowed or stagnated but elevated yourself.  Well done!  Thank you also for your very thoughtful and affirming words of humanity.  Excelsior!!! 

Edited by Bloodscythe
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I'm not gonna tell you "Nah, man! You can't leave!!!" because I'm pretty guilty of being MIA myself. It's a hard thing, many people have left and, socially, things aren't the same. I understand where you're coming from and perhaps if these were your feelings a few years prior, I would have tried to talk you out of it. 

For what it's worth, I've always enjoyed your posts. I also consider you a friend, even though almost all of our interaction has been through the forums. I also admire the fact that you stay true to your personality, even if a few people are giving you hell for it. Don't let those ass holes break your spirit now, their voices are only loud because so many other voices have disappeared.

If you do decide to leave (the forums too), make sure to send me a PM so that we can keep in touch in the future. You're a good man.

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Comic sans is the most annoying font on the whole world.

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I find interesting parallels to economic market sentiment and crowd behavior.  People believe the game is dying, and so it is. Until it is not.

 

There is a certain palpable disconnect between reward and effort as of late, economically, socially, intrinsically within the game. Given the attachment to the game, with the amount of effort we expend, it is not an easy break up for those of us who are leaving. 

 

That being said wurm, like real life, ebbs and flows. The opportunity of departure will allow for new players to take up the mantle. I would hope that helpful players like you, WITH YOUR COMIC SANS , and constructive demeanor, remain around. It is to the benefit of the game.

 

Hopefully with a thinned herd, and renewed interest from  added content, the economy and population of wurm trends back up. With it hopefully some of the pervasive dourness dissipates, and it can go back to being the wurm community we love and know. 

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Some may have said this, and I myself have played since our toons looked like lego-men. *newtown*

I am not going to argue or support any notions here. Yep, there's been some newer joiners, most of them amazing, a few rotten ones that bought toons from folks who used to be amazing (and that caused some big confusion and drama for me).

One thing that stands hard in wurm for me, is the "escape and mystery" of it.

 

For that reason, the only way to play is to disable and turn of chat tabs, even CA help (and trade too if you're so inclined). Without chat, wurm is the way I know and like it.

It still is pretty awesome, just look past the 'problem child' problem, ignore it, distance from it - enjoy the world and the good folks. They are in the majority.

 

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31 minutes ago, nygen said:

I find interesting parallels to economic market sentiment and crowd behavior.  People believe the game is dying, and so it is. Until it is not.

 

There is a certain palpable disconnect between reward and effort as of late, economically, socially, intrinsically within the game. Given the attachment to the game, with the amount of effort we expend, it is not an easy break up for those of us who are leaving. 

 

That being said wurm, like real life, ebbs and flows. The opportunity of departure will allow for new players to take up the mantle. I would hope that helpful players like you, WITH YOUR COMIC SANS , and constructive demeanor, remain around. It is to the benefit of the game.

 

Hopefully with a thinned herd, and renewed interest from  added content, the economy and population of wurm trends back up. With it hopefully some of the pervasive dourness dissipates, and it can go back to being the wurm community we love and know. 

Interesting notion about economics and utils of satisfaction.  I have seen maybe 3 iterative waves of market players fall off when their threshold of profitability and reason to stick around passes.   When  money supplies tighten, so do people's tolerances.  People have less room to accommodate lofty principles and human nature that is not of their brand when their own wallets shrink. Targets to blame then begins.

Edited by Autumnoc
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Well said.

Wurm is what it is, and perhaps, even improves over time.

The only thing that change, is people, the one who matter stays... the rest can be muted, blocked and ignored.

Works for me.

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          As no one wants to read a I'm quitting post (which they usually come back) this is not that type of thing.  It's more to say the mood has changed where there is more biting and gnawing than usual.  It is also to ofc express my thoughts and feelings about it in hopes for greater tolerance. 

          I think about all the odd lovely quirky or sometimes obnoxious or arrogant behavior I tolerate in players and oddly some are the ones that criticize my manner of speech or thoughts.  It's not even about a sensitivity issue as what i've more often seen is the very 'gruff tuff' players put in the same circumstance to not just chin up but instead will act as if a horror not seen in the common hour for centuries ever existed

          I can own that I'm more verbose than others and trim some back yet any more or silencing myself is to also remove me.  This post was made to open a dialogue about a wider discussion on how we treat each and the climate of the game for better change and improvement.  Given the responses it is clear my observation is correct there has in fact been a climate change to player interaction so this wasn't in vain. 

          To one player, I try to hardly talk in order to accommodate their self expressed lack of interest in my conversations. Interaction is on an as needed basis of game function and activity to avoid non response or something dismissive that would leave me wondering.  To pvp related conversation i'll relegate my thoughts to the sanctuary of my head only, as the candor about epic outcomes and fallout already resulted in some hurt feels and a condemnation/rejection of my expression in a very place free expression was to exist.

          I will forge forward with amending my words more and perhaps take on the two projects I mentioned earlier above.  If the climate persists I'll revisit the notion of pulling out of the game.  It is after all only a small number of naysayers and I am aware and have the support of friends made in game.  This was also for the others in similar situations that didn't or don't have the same courage to speak up.

Edited by Bloodscythe
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On 8/15/2019 at 12:15 PM, ArthurHawkwing said:

 

 

On 8/15/2019 at 7:17 PM, solmark said:

 

Moderator delete this post. Entered in error. Thank you!

Edited by Fineal
Mistake post. Did not mean to quote. Was just dragging my mouse around.

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Love reading your posts, keep it up.  Hope you find that spark of fun and joy once again. Having said that, a bit of a break may be what is required.  Don't be shy or feel bad if you feel you need to be away for awhile.

 

All the best.

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Bloodscythe, you and I have spoken from time to time in discord and in game. I think we are very similar in playstyles. We wander, we do what we feel like at the time, we play both PVP and PVE on both Epic and Chaos. We've been on opposing sides as well as the same side. I still remember how you made my heart stop when I was sailing my alts to another server on Epic and you showed up with a boatload of your own and I didn't yet know we were in the same kingdom.

 

When I feel like it's time to leave the game, I go play WU or other games such as Gloria Invictus, Fallout, ESO, Runescape, etc. Though I did leave for 2 years when WU came out, only coming here to put in upkeep in my Indy deed, when I made my own server which is still running today without  a break except for June 2017 when I loaded a new 4k map. That is the same month I came back to WO and woke up on Chaos in a deserted village.

 

I find I can never really leave as there is always some other mountain to climb, cave to explore, goal to achieve, friends to visit with, or battle to fight. The community is not what it once was, but there are enough individuals who are special to me that I still enjoy socializing with.

 

You speak how I speak, you delineate the subject you are discussing. Today's world forces many to always be in a rush, hence tldr. But I think people who do so are robbing themselves.

 

Your proposed project sounds wonderful. Perhaps that is the thing that could keep you from leaving for awhile. Myself, I would love to visit but would not commit to the time to see such a project through to completion. I'm sure the wanderlust in me would make me want to leave before much time had passed.

 

My hope is that you remain in WO. I have enjoyed our conversations together and hope to have many more.   

 

Edited by Fineal
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Been trying for a couple days now to figure out how to express my thoughts on this in something less than a small novelette and without it being just a collection of jumbled thoughts with no coherency.  lol.  Some of the comments here have been spot on, imo.  I can't tell you how many times I've felt similar and thought about just walking away, but I think sometimes the best thing is to not think about quitting per se, which has an element of finality to it, but to just do other things for a while, while still maintaining deeds, etc., and maybe just playing now and then when the mood hits.  I also do this with a few different WU servers I play on as well. Each different from each other and each with it's own charms. 

 

I think that Wurm generally attracts what you referred to in another thread as free spirits, but of course not all Wurm players are.  And I see that type of clash of personalities more often than not on these forums.  As for me, I have always preferred to think of myself as a free spirit who doesn't want to be pigeon-holed as one thing, one type of person, etc. (Sounds great to me but others just see that as a negative.) There is so much variety and diversity in the world that to limit myself, I feel, would make life unbearable.  But society tells us we are supposed to "find" ourselves, define ourselves, find our pigeon-hole and say "this is who and what I am."  This is seen as normal and desirable, and something we should all strive for.  Even when we don't hear that in words, we absorb it through osmosis via TV, social media, song lyrics, etc., etc., ad nauseum.  I've never been a joiner, or wanting to identify with any group, or to say I'm this or I'm that. But  I've also come to the conclusion that in general the herd mentality is the norm.  So-called "normal" people want to find & define themselves and "belong" somewhere. And I've found that what feels comfortable and normal for me is seen as odd-ball more often than not by the majority of people I meet.  They're always trying to figure me out and discover what pigeon-hole I fit into. Good luck with that, lol.  In reality I have no pigeon hole.

 

Anyway, starting to ramble here so back on subject. lol.  From what I've seen I think you are a "free spirit" as well and maybe just haven't become completely comfortable with it yet. Wurm has fewer people right now than we've seen at other times, this limits the pool of potential like-minded people. And those who are also free spirits & like-minded are generally going to be off doing their own thing, flitting about and enjoying life.  lol.  So I would say just step back now & then and smell the roses somewhere else for a while without burning any proverbial bridges. :)   Try a WU server or 3, or go on a youtube binge for a while.  It can be so refreshing.

Edited by Amadee
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well mister scythe i pondered our conversation this morning a little and came up with a solution

since wurm has a active population of about ~300 people at any given time on all clusters/servers maybe we should probably quote unquote kill them with kindness like that stupidass selena gomez song that is always on the playlist of all the clothing outlets.

i've taken it upon myself to reach out to someone who i've had some trouble with a few hours ago and basically try to bury the hatchet, end the feud, and have chaos be a more bearable place for me personally if i were ever to return.  the feller who i reached out to was basically described to me in the third person as at one point "being inseparable and someone who i always did everything with" and so i sent them a little 6 euro-ish gift on that basis.  i plan on reaching out to a couple other people and asking them if they'd chill out a little bit, but that is not to say I like them or have anything to do with them.

low key trolling is probably not a good answer and comparing these folks to uncompromising fascists/communists (same thing really) is probably not a cool thing.  it's a game of items with monetary value attached to them and very personal relationships, but it's still a game nonetheless.

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At first I wondered if wise to make a post of this kind yet the responses received both here and in pms has assured me I wasn't off course.   Some comments I expected, yet I didn't expect many to take time to put down thoughts or the heartfelt pms.  That takes more effort, time , and courage, as well as care.  I thank you for that.   It also affirmed what I suspected to be in that others not only had similiar observations but were in some ways having experiences of this nature as well.   This not only gives me the notion that it was a timely post, yet also gives me hope some may change as a result, and or others will be buoyed in knowing they are not alone. 

 

Of the good suggestions, I wanted to highlight the general essence of them in that, to take things with a grain of salt, take breaks from time to time from game, and another useful was to turn off GL chat from time to time and only use local, alliance, village tabs to screen out constant complainers or doom deliverers.

 

Their remains good in the community that still holds the helpful, resourceful, cut above the rest players we've come to know of wurm over the years.  As the game evolves it's good to know some things remain and unlost.  Once again to all that took the time to read, let alone comment , I Thank you.

Edited by Bloodscythe
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