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Niki

Major issue with rude people

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2 hours ago, SmeJack said:

Pretending coops is all you talk about is cute.

Please stop with the passive aggressive posting please and thank you. It's getting old.

Edited by Niki

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There was a time where coups or you were going to start a coup that got old. To be honest. Enough of a reason to ignore people when brash said it better than I will. Wurm is an escape for many, not a second life text simulator.

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If you start a thread by calling other people rude because of your own opinion and trying to tell us how its bad and is a problem, and don't like the responses and call someone a jerk, doesn't that make you the rude person?  Especially when you know, you've made posts targeted at other people creating drama by claiming they are why the game is failing?

 

To clarify this post and my first one in the thread, yes I don't do small talk, but when you pass me sailing and wave in local, I'm not going to wave back and have a personal conversation or courtesy to someone that has only ever tried to smear my name on the forums

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59 minutes ago, MrGARY said:

If you start a thread by calling other people rude because of your own opinion and trying to tell us how its bad and is a problem, and don't like the responses and call someone a jerk, doesn't that make you the rude person?  Especially when you know, you've made posts targeted at other people creating drama by claiming they are why the game is failing?

 

To clarify this post and my first one in the thread, yes I don't do small talk, but when you pass me sailing and wave in local, I'm not going to wave back and have a personal conversation or courtesy to someone that has only ever tried to smear my name on the forums

She edited her post so I have as well, to be honest though this is a serious thread. Please understand.

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2 hours ago, Niki said:

Please stop with the passive aggressive posting please and thank you. It's getting old.

Disagree, I hope this is only the beginning.

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If you are outspoken and confrontational on these forums some people will hold that against you and shun you within the game in response. Then they collaborate with their friends expressing their negative opinion of you and some of them will treat you the same way without ever having any interactions with you. This is human nature and especially negatively focused people are prone to this type of response.

 

Although I always try to treat people within the game with what I consider common courtesy if they respond in this manner for the reasons I described and then ignore me within the game it really doesn't bother me. Then I don't have anything to do with them either. I don't consider this as any loss since we are just not the personality types that get along. There is no way to please everyone especially when you are bold enough to criticize their point of view on these forums. You in particular can be confrontational at times so I would think that you should understand that this may be the result. Just be yourself and those like what you have to say will appreciate you for it. Don't try to conform yourself to their opinions of how you should be unless you find it beneficial to temper your own reactions at times so as not to be abusive or fall into a negative state of mind.

 

"You see, you can't please everyone, so you got to please yourself" Sage lyrics to live by.

 

=Ayes=

 

 

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Nobody has to like you.

You don't have to like everyone.

Everyone likes what you do.

 

Learn to accept and let go.

 

?

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37 minutes ago, Ayes said:

If you are outspoken and confrontational on these forums some people will hold that against you and shun you within the game in response. Then they collaborate with their friends expressing their negative opinion of you and some of them will treat you the same way without ever having any interactions with you. This is human nature and especially negatively focused people are prone to this type of response.

Yeah pretty much. I think we both know this all to well Ayes. I do think it's silly to be honest, I play other sandbox games and this is uncommon behavior outside of Wurm. However this is a multicultural game I guess, I keep forgetting that.

 

 

6 minutes ago, Shmeric said:

Nobody has to like you.

You don't have to like everyone.

Everyone likes what you do.

 

Learn to accept and let go.

 

?

That's not the point of this thread. What is wrong with being nice to other people. I've accepted the fact and let it go and made a thread about it to enlighten others. Who knows some good might come out it.

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Just do what any peaceful minded individual does.

 

If you're passing by and folks ignore you, they're probably not worth knowing.

 

If they live in your local and ignore you, infest their home with crocs.  ;)

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I don't see many people in local but I try to greet the ones I do see.  If I get a greeting back - great. If I don't - not a problem.  Don't take it personal and move on.  ?

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@Niki

 

I am a very social person. I have been playing online and doing most of my social interactions for the past two decades through chat rooms/voice chat (other than work.) I am also a very curious person and I often try to understand why people behave online the way they do. Here is what I have learned over the years.

 

1) The online social interactions have changed a lot. Back in early 2000, voice chat was not a thing. Everyone communicated through text for the most part. Sure some guilds had their voice comms such as ventrilo, but they were not widely used. In fact, I went through nearly a decade of FFXI never even hearing the voice of my best friends. I only knew them through their avatars and their text. Now everything is different, but many of us who grew with the text based culture have clinged to it more than the many milenials who play games nowdays for whom voice comms was integral to their gaming. 

 

2) The text client in Wurm is pretty terrible. The letters are tiny and complicated to resize, and many of us arent that young anymore. I struggle to see what the heck text here says. Since I spend most of my time on voice comms with friends, I simply don't read local or game chat. At all. You can ask Gladiator and Deskjet how many times they have wasted their effort with sending me PMs. I don't realize I have been pm'd until hours later. Now they know better and just ping me on discord.

 

3) Some people are not forum persons. They only go to the forums to buy something or to look for information, if that. I know friends who have hundreds of pms waiting to be read because they don't know/care about it. 

 

4) Perhaps they don't speak english. This game brings communities who are not english speakers. At one point I had a chinese guy living next to me. He never responded to my greetings and acted the most strange of ways around my deed. Until one day he said "no english china". 

 

5) Some people just want to see the world burn. Maybe a friend of him told him one of those stories about you. Or maybe someone somewhere complained about one of your sales and they swore eternal hate towards you. Some people are just plain dumb or don't give a rats ass.

 

6) They could be botting. Maybe the person doesn't respond because they aren't there.

 

Regardless, there are many reasons why the person doesn't respond that have nothing to do with being rude or hating you. My suggestion to you is don't take it personal. Keep in mind this is a game, and people can't hear you type. If they are sitting on their keyboard pressing their "dig" key while watching Netflix, there is a very high chance they won't see your pm until hours after the fact.

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11 hours ago, Niki said:

Yeah well Jake, I'm afraid there is no pleasing you. I'm certain you're the most grumpiest person in wurm. ?

+1 can confirm 

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2 hours ago, Angelklaine said:

@Niki

 

I am a very social person. I have been playing online and doing most of my social interactions for the past two decades through chat rooms/voice chat (other than work.) I am also a very curious person and I often try to understand why people behave online the way they do. Here is what I have learned over the years.

 

1) The online social interactions have changed a lot. Back in early 2000, voice chat was not a thing. Everyone communicated through text for the most part. Sure some guilds had their voice comms such as ventrilo, but they were not widely used. In fact, I went through nearly a decade of FFXI never even hearing the voice of my best friends. I only knew them through their avatars and their text. Now everything is different, but many of us who grew with the text based culture have clinged to it more than the many milenials who play games nowdays for whom voice comms was integral to their gaming. 

 

2) The text client in Wurm is pretty terrible. The letters are tiny and complicated to resize, and many of us arent that young anymore. I struggle to see what the heck text here says. Since I spend most of my time on voice comms with friends, I simply don't read local or game chat. At all. You can ask Gladiator and Deskjet how many times they have wasted their effort with sending me PMs. I don't realize I have been pm'd until hours later. Now they know better and just ping me on discord.

 

3) Some people are not forum persons. They only go to the forums to buy something or to look for information, if that. I know friends who have hundreds of pms waiting to be read because they don't know/care about it. 

 

4) Perhaps they don't speak english. This game brings communities who are not english speakers. At one point I had a chinese guy living next to me. He never responded to my greetings and acted the most strange of ways around my deed. Until one day he said "no english china". 

 

5) Some people just want to see the world burn. Maybe a friend of him told him one of those stories about you. Or maybe someone somewhere complained about one of your sales and they swore eternal hate towards you. Some people are just plain dumb or don't give a rats ass.

 

6) They could be botting. Maybe the person doesn't respond because they aren't there.

 

Regardless, there are many reasons why the person doesn't respond that have nothing to do with being rude or hating you. My suggestion to you is don't take it personal. Keep in mind this is a game, and people can't hear you type. If they are sitting on their keyboard pressing their "dig" key while watching Netflix, there is a very high chance they won't see your pm until hours after the fact.

Good points, thank you.

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I'm playing Wurm in a passionately passive way, meaning my clients run on tiny windows arranged on one screen while I do other stuff on the other screen. This makes me miss a lot that's going on. One of my previous neighbors found it quite amusing to see if I'll answer in her passing by with a wave or not (I'd like to say it was about 50:50, but I may be even more scatterbrained than that.), and we became good acquintances eventually.

I don't think we would have interacted as much outside of exchanging greetings (Small things like you give me X, I give you Y at some other ocasion, little favors that aren't treated as trades but mutual benefits and favors) if she had got offended over my doing other things.

 

I do reckon the person in your particular story really seemed to go out of their way to ignore you, but wether or not it's a prolonged phenomenon, this isn't worth getting personally insulted over it, because it's either not concerning you personally or as Etherdrifter said, they aren't worth your time. And probably don't want to be. And nobody has an obligation to be "worth your time", aswell. I don't mean to be the ###### you maybe think I am for not having greeted back once(Which I don't mean in a facetious way, it may have happened knowing myself), but the whole premise of this post seems really misguided, because it's literally a non-issue imho, let alone a major one.

 

And if you think this diminishes how great the community is, try playing in one where you'd wish people could shut up for once. I'll take the silent stranger any day over a toxic loudmouth.

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