Sign in to follow this  
Ayuna

Loneliness in Wurm

Recommended Posts

Stop and wave to every new player you meet, because you don't know who may be lonely and dying for someone to talk to.

 

Just over this past week I've befriended two players who confided that they had no one to talk to or keep them company in-game. They were surprised and overjoyed when I waved to them first and then even engaged with them. One is a disabled player, for example. On a server that's fairly populous.

 

Not sure if every MMO out there has this problem. My gut says "no".

  • Like 24

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I wish I had more people to talk to. I was used to be in a "guild" that always had people on. I could jump in comms anytime and find people to talk to. I am very social. I have even built extra houses on my deed in the hopes I can scoop a villager or two.

 

I think Wurm needs more friendly travelers like Ayuna.

  • Like 5

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

do you live on independence? I live on Exodus and if i wave to somebody, 80% of the time its an afk player, and 20% of the time they respond. Lovely experience though when they do answer

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I just remember my villager saying KFAQL all the time when someone crossed local.

 

KFAQL meant: Kill First Ask Questions Later

 

Good old Affliction 1.0, best time I had in wurm

  • Like 4

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
1 hour ago, LorenaMontana said:

I just remember my villager saying KFAQL all the time when someone crossed local.

 

KFAQL meant: Kill First Ask Questions Later

 

Good old Affliction 1.0, best time I had in wurm

Rip the dream.

  • Like 2

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Maybe slightly off-topic, but related to the original post in a way:

 

I once played a different online game and was part and later a leader of a guild. In our guild we had a player - a relatively young fellow - who loved playing in a role of a "tank". He wasn't the best tank we had, but he was certainly not the worst and he was visibly improving from week to week... working very hard at getting better. His joy from being part of a large guild and having an increasingly important role was very visible to us all. One day, he simply vanished. We learned quickly that he passed away. It turned out that the player was a very sick person with deteriorating health who was in late stage of his illness. He was bound to a wheelchair and had increasing trouble performing many every day actions... except playing on the computer. The game we played - especially our guild - became very important to him, as it was his only source of entertainment that he could indepenently enjoy. His parents told us later that he often spoke of us and considered our acceptance of him a very important factor in his life. Of course, none of us knew he was sick...

 

We were all nice to him, but none of us formed a close bond with the player, nor stopped to chat at length. While my relationship with him was very friendly, to this day I wish I spent a bit more time making him feel a bit more special.

 

So...

 

Don't forget to love people. They leave so fast...

 

Edited by Valdor
  • Like 36

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Whenever I leave my house to greet people about to come ashore they turn their ship around and leave hastily. I suppose they just hoped for plunder :/

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Give me hotkey for Wave action and I'll start doing it more often... <_<

 

(don't say it's already possible)

  • Like 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I was going to add some of my experiences, but... Valdor's sad and touching story beats everything I had in mind. Thanks, mate! (And thanks for the OP and its positive spirit - that's what Wurm Online should be about!)

 

  • Like 3

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
7 hours ago, LorenaMontana said:

I just remember my villager saying KFAQL all the time when someone crossed local.

 

KFAQL meant: Kill First Ask Questions Later

 

... and that is the exact opposite.. :wacko:

  • Like 2

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
11 minutes ago, Yaga said:

 

... and that is the exact opposite.. :wacko:

Depends on game setup. Affliction, home of the HOTS should be that way, it is for that playstyle. I completely accept that mindset there if I'm not totally wrong it was originally designed to be that way anyway.

Yiraia, I was quite sad seeing a lot of very actively online characters not responding to my waves on the servers then I realized those toons are mostly trader deed campers - they are zombies without any brain. If you see them online 7/24 and they are sitting always on the very exact tile just treat them as decorations in the local tab :)

Nice encounters happen along the road, good chats sometimes and also it feels real good when I forget again to have supplies with me on a longer trip and offers for a few bites or a bunch of cotton feel real great.

 

  • Like 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
9 hours ago, Ayuna said:

Not sure if every MMO out there has this problem.

Usually worse, so far in Wurm my experience with random people has been pleasant when they bother to wave back. In other mmos, at least modern MMOs even when you play with others you're usually fighting with them over certain resource/gear,  which always seem to generate hostility instead. 

My first 3-4 days of wurm were basically me logging in.. and logging off a few minutes later because there was nobody to talk to or play with, even began to doubt if paying for the online version vs WU was a mistake I hosted my own server and played with my GF there. 

 

There are a lot of nice and friendly people in Wurm, there are also those that will put you on a KOS list just because you happened to walk to close of their deed. So far I can't complain, the forums are usually a lot more toxic than the actual game itself though.
I'm always down to make new friends, I have a very dark sense of humor though :3

 

5 hours ago, Valdor said:

Don't forget to love people. They leave so fast...

This.. this 100x

Be kind, you don't always know what people are going through... maybe you're that missing link to brighten up their day.

 

 

 

 

Edited by Legios
  • Like 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
32 minutes ago, Jaz said:

Depends on game setup. Affliction, home of the HOTS should be that way, it is for that playstyle. I completely accept that mindset there if I'm not totally wrong it was originally designed to be that way anyway.

 

 

You are right, Jaz - I agree. So I should change my words to: "... that's what Wurm Online Freedom should be about! " :)

 

  • Like 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

"Be kind whenever possible.

It is always possible."

-Dalai Lama

 

  • Like 3

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

your story is a good one and the OP has a point.. my long time .. well one year or two fellow gamer has gone afk for quite awhile.. I find myself looking to my friends list and trying to rationalize the long absence but its to no avail.. I can only hope for the best and she had just lost her husband of many years.. so this post saddens me so but also makes me remember the frist time I met her nad all the cool things we did.. and shes in my heart now and will always hold a place there..

  • Like 2

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I have some wurm friends who just disappeared and some I still know nothing about since - it is great relief when I see any of them being active much later. I don't mind if someone just disappears my only hopes are nothing bad happened to them in RL.

  • Like 3

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

You should try the game "Meadow", its a lovely social experience, its on steam, almost free, and its good for a couple of hours.

 

There you will see how without chat of any kind, only preset gestures and emoticons, game design can make communication possible and needed.  In fact Meadow is all about working in teams and coordinating, without the use of words.

 

My point is, ease of access to, and well thought out gestures for players can go a long way in improving the communication, and maybe helping that silent type engage you when you are passing through his local.

 

 

 

  • Like 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Within the past 4 years I have played this game, I have seen communities come and go, lived in different locations and servers, do this and that... but in my heart I have asked only one thing the whole time; to live on a mutual, active and joyful community, so whenever I log in, there's always someone online (thanks to U.S. folks for being online mostly on my very uncommon playing hours from European point of view!) and always someone that I could talk to. Time passes much smoother in a game, when I have perfect distraction from the hours and hours lasting grind to something wonderful, like discussing daily matters, the game or life in general. I have suffered loneliness greatly in this game, before I found my current community. I never felt any previous locations where I lived as a home, when I felt like something big was missing. I cannot thank NEXA folk enough! :wub:

 

And btw, the whole 4 years I have played this game and done some travels and met people, just passing by or participating on same event I am... I always wave! :) And hug close friends if around ;) Emotes are a great way to impress those basic human interaction methods, where you feel warmly welcome and be noticed by other people. Wish there could be even more emotes, love em!

Edited by Kadmint
  • Like 3

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
On 6/21/2017 at 8:22 PM, Yiraia said:

do you live on independence? I live on Exodus and if i wave to somebody, 80% of the time its an afk player, and 20% of the time they respond. Lovely experience though when they do answer

 

It's for those 20% that all this trouble is worth it.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I go through phases of being social and then less social. Wurm is generally better than most MMOs because at least the players are more my age and over that phase of running around screaming obscenities. Mostly. :D  Indy is pretty friendly and I'm glad I moved there. 

Edited by NeeNee

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
15 minutes ago, NeeNee said:

I go through phases of being social and then less social. Wurm is generally better than most MMOs because at least the players are more my age and over that phase of running around screaming obscenities. Mostly. :D  Indy is pretty friendly and I'm glad I moved there. 

It took literally all my willpower to not scream out some obscenities in jest. :P

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
On ‎6‎/‎21‎/‎2017 at 7:12 PM, Ayuna said:

Stop and wave to every new player you meet, because you don't know who may be lonely and dying for someone to talk to.

Ayuna, we can not be but what we are by nature. Some (*most* probably) are very gregarious and enjoy human interaction. Others prefer various degrees of alone time to refresh their need to then interact with others. Wurm offers many opportunities to get to know other people but not everyone has the same desires of that depth.

 

Your admonition here is a nice idea but just take what I said into consideration. Although I enjoy interacting with others at times and will casually treat most all with courtesy, my general preference would be to spend most time focusing upon what I am doing rather than chatting away distractedly. Yet maybe the offhand o/ has more impact than I imagine.

 

Happy Trails

=Ayes=

Edited by Ayes
*
  • Like 2

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

 

On 6/21/2017 at 11:44 PM, Valdor said:

Maybe slightly off-topic, but related to the original post in a way:

 

I once played a different online game and was part and later a leader of a guild. In our guild we had a player - a relatively young fellow - who loved playing in a role of a "tank". He wasn't the best tank we had, but he was certainly not the worst and he was visibly improving from week to week... working very hard at getting better. His joy from being part of a large guild and having an increasingly important role was very visible to us all. One day, he simply vanished. We learned quickly that he passed away. It turned out that the player was a very sick person with deteriorating health who was in late stage of his illness. He was bound to a wheelchair and had increasing trouble performing many every day actions... except playing on the computer. The game we played - especially our guild - became very important to him, as it was his only source of entertainment that he could indepenently enjoy. His parents told us later that he often spoke of us and considered our acceptance of him a very important factor in his life. Of course, none of us knew he was sick...

 

We were all nice to him, but none of us formed a close bond with the player, nor stopped to chat at length. While my relationship with him was very friendly, to this day I wish I spent a bit more time making him feel a bit more special.

 

So...

 

Don't forget to love people. They leave so fast...

 

 

Thank you so much for this, Valdor...

If anyone wants to read of a very similar story, I found it while exploring another MMO.

Edited by Ayuna
  • Like 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now
Sign in to follow this