Have you given any thought to trying pvp servers?
You do not have to pvp on them most groups are happy to just have people around actively, usually great communities (seriously very few that were or are not)
Most have many active players and do group stuff together whether it be building towers, building deeds, digging, pvp list goes on.
PVP is often mis judged in the fact that you cannot go there and play as a "freedomer" that is almost always certainly an option.
The way things generally function is as if you are a large family/community and people will play other games together in the group often as well.
Maybe consider trying it, if not well now you see why some of us DO NOT play much on any of the freedom servers